Guided Loving-Kindness (Metta) Meditation – 30 Minutes (How do I Meditate?)


[Music] [Laughter] [Music] welcome this is a guided loving-kindness or meant to meditation instruction for more information you can go to Dhamma sukha dot org and read more about it first find a comfortable position you can sit on a cushion or sit in the chair there is no magic to the floor we want you to be comfortable there shouldn’t be any discomfort that’s from your body the mind will have enough to keep you busy relax whatever is comfortable [Music] take a deep breath let it out [Music] take a minute or two to just be here here in the present [Music] this meditation is about observation and not trying simply being and allowing [Music] notice you are breathing [Music] notice the feelings happening in the body notice the feeling of sitting how is your mind is it sleepy or is it awake and full of energy are you feeling restless or calm relaxed and slow down settle into the chair into the cushion relax your whole body everything that comes into your awareness simply release it and relax and come back to the present don’t pay any particular attention to anything this will turn in to later what we call the six arse see how your mind is becoming spacious you notice the entire room and everything going on around you you relax and be with it everything is okay you feel some gratitude for being allowed to sit quietly with nothing to do you’re thankful for having some time for yourself [Music] so let’s get started with our meta our loving-kindness meditation or what we call from the sutas the practice of the brahma vihara [Music] when you practice loving-kindness meditation you first start by sending loving and kind thoughts to yourself you were a member a time when you were happy when that happy feeling arises smile it’s a warm glowing feeling in the center of your chest the feeling is like holding a baby and looking into its eyes you feel this radiant loving kindness in your heart or perhaps a a puppy or a kitten whatever brought you this feeling of kindness of warmth you let it be there we didn’t try you just allowed feel that happy feeling now a really helpful technique is to smile put a little smile on your lips just a little a Buddha smile smile from your heart and smile from your mind smiling can pull you out of negative states and thinking so smile during your whole sitting always come back to a feeling of happiness with a smile I’ll take this happy feeling and radiate it to yourself help it along with some phrases like may I be happy [Music] may I be content may I be peaceful don’t just say these phrases like a mantra you need to feel them and only use phrases as reminders of that warm beautiful feeling phrases are not the object their only to nudge along this beautiful feeling this feeling of loving-kindness now sit with your back reasonably straight not too tight don’t move your body at all don’t wiggle your toes don’t wiggle your fingers don’t scratch don’t rub don’t change your posture don’t rock back and forth sit very still like a Buddha statue and remember on every Buddha statue the Buddha is smiling the little smile smile of equanimity of happiness when you don’t move it’s like getting water to freeze you can observe the water but you can’t push it or move it you have to let it be there freezing by itself relax into any tension and tightness that makes you want to move relax smile you have this time for yourself be content put everything else aside tell your mind you’ll think about all these things later that might come up don’t worry they’ll come up if they need to may I be happy may I be content and I smile and be peaceful yeah I have gratitude for everything that I have as soon as that warm loving feeling arises make a wish for your own happiness may I be free from suffering may my mind be uplifted may my mind be peaceful and calm they my mind be open and accepting may I have happiness may I have joy are you smiling put that little smile on your lips and feel that smile radiating throughout your body may I be content whatever wish you make for yourself feel that’s sincere wish you know what it feels like to be peaceful and calm bring that feeling into your heart radiate that feeling to yourself wish for yourself to be happy whatever wish you verbalize make it with a smile feel that wish you can make the same wish again as long as it has sincere meaning for you or you can change the wish occasionally yeah I be happy my whole body be completely relaxed now when you’re sitting your mind is going to wander and think about other things as soon as you notice mind is thinking about other things simply let go of those thoughts even if you’re in mid-sentence just let it go and relax smile and come back to this feeling of loving-kindness relax any tension and tightness in your mind caused by the thoughts thoughts of desire thoughts of the future thoughts of the past lots of things you want to do in the present I want I don’t want I I relax and smile release these thoughts come back to the feeling of loving-kindness and make a wish for your own happiness with another smile it doesn’t matter if your mind wanders fifty times during a sitting and fifty times you see that you let it go you relax you come back with a smile to your meditation object that is a good sitting a bad sitting would be if you stopped smiling when you notice that you’re thinking and you continue thinking about it and you don’t let it go that’s having no awareness and no mindfulness while you’re sitting there can be sensations that arise in your body you might want to COFF or there’s an itch heat vibration for just some painful feeling it doesn’t matter as soon as that arises your mind will be drawn to it you’ll start to think about that sensation I wish it would stop I really don’t like this feeling when it happens I wish it would just go away every thought like that makes the feeling become bigger and more intense allow them relax into them if you do need to COFF you simply allow that to happen and continue on if you need to swallow go ahead just don’t move your body and relax the very first thing you do is to let go of a thought about the sensation release your attention from it just stop thinking about it that’s release relax the tension or tightness in your mind in your head that’s the next thing so your just release you’ve stopped thinking about it and then you relax that desire that pulls you to the thought makes you want to go to the store and whatever it is now you may notice there’s still a tight mental fist wrapped around that sensation because you really don’t like that sensation and you really want it to go away the truth is when a sensation arises it’s there that’s the truth you can’t change it you can’t wish for it to be something something else it is just what it is so we be mindful we be in the present everything is okay and it’s okay for that sensation to be there it has to be okay because it’s there anytime you try to fight with the truth anytime you try to control the truth anytime you try to make the truth be anything other than it is that is the cause of suffering wanting to change things wanting things to be something other than they are something that you have to do in the future you have to make something better no everything is okay right now again allow that sensation to be there make it okay for it to be there relax gently come back to the feeling of being happy and making a wish for your own happiness while you’re doing this meditation remember this is a smiling meditation remember you want to put a smile in your mind and even though your eyes are closed put a little smile in your eyes put a smile on your lips a little one and a smile in your heart radiates that smile from your heart whenever you notice that you’re not smiling start again gently don’t push don’t control just everything let it be you have all the time in the world after about ten minutes now we can start sending loving and kind thoughts to a spiritual friend one spiritual friend and the beginning of your training the objective of this one spiritual friends described in this way a spiritual friend is someone of the same sex they’re not a family member and they are alive easy a spiritual friend someone who when you think of them and their good qualities you really like them you respect them and you will sincerely wish them happiness once you pick your friend don’t change the friend to someone else stay with just this one friend for some time and you are told that it’s okay to change now this friend can be a friend of yours it can be your teacher it can be somebody who you know very well and you like them and you respect them somebody that you can feel loving-kindness for and you don’t have other thoughts that interfere now we’re trying to get the mind to stay with just one object in the beginning later when there are signs of progress in your meditation we’ll add more people and other methods but not just yet now you make a wish for your spiritual friends happiness just like you did for yourself make a wish for his or her happiness may you be free from suffering may your mind be uplifted may your mind be peaceful and calm [Music] smile at your friend hold them in your heart may your mind be open and accepting may you have happiness just as I do [Music] may you have joy whatever wish you want to make for your friend feel that wish take your spiritual friend and put them right in the middle of your heart smile and give them a great big heart hug wish your friend well feel that wish take a real interest in your friend really like them now you don’t have to visualize perfectly your friend all you have to do is know they’re there you are just hanging out with your friend wrapping them up in good kind thoughts if the feeling slips a little smile more and move back to sending it to yourself to build it up again then come back to your friend and keep it going with another smile we only use one spiritual friend to begin our training because the mind may want to distract itself because it says oh another spiritual friend is good let me go there but that’s actually the mind distracting itself and not being able to stay with one object later you’ll use other people and other groups of people so continue with your spiritual friend wrap him or her up in your heart and hold them remember that puppy remember that baby bring your loving kindness to them just like you did before [Music] if your mind wanders remember to release the thought relax the tension pulling you three smile return to your object your feeling of loving kindness for your friend and repeat these are the six RS these remind you of what to do when your mind wanders we don’t jerk our mind back because if we do that our mind will just keep doing it again and again we only observe when it is wandered we allow it and then we just relax we don’t try to control but we see the tension and tightness we go okay that’s okay and it fades and then we smile and come back this is different than many other methods and it’s much more effective may my friend be happy and they be free from suffering may they be happy maybe they feel the kindness in my heart may they be at peace in the present moment everything be well in their lives and they feel gratitude for what they have may they be free of anger a their mind and their heart be cool keep them in your heart give them a heart hug wrap them up in happiness may we both be happy and we both be loving and kind they are mines be peaceful and quiet may our minds be relaxed and still hey my friend get everything that they need especially contentment and happiness may their health be free of issues either health be perfect and radiant may they be happy may they be content now this is a feeling meditation notice this feeling of loving-kindness and again don’t put too much attention on what they look like but what the feeling that you feel feels like can be subtle it can be strong it can be weak it doesn’t matter just stay with this feeling this warm glowing feeling don’t hold on to it just observe it that it be there and when your mind wanders notice how it does that investigate what happened first what happens second and smile again and come back to your friend may all beings be happy and content you can visit our website when you think you have things that you want to discuss [Music] you


5 Responses

  1. LeMétaphysicien

    January 24, 2019 5:34 pm

    Please, what do you mean by: "when progress appears please contact us at Dhamma Sukha Meditation Center for further guidance at [email protected]" What is your definition of "progress"? And what are the "benefits" of this meditation?

  2. Irena Bushong

    February 22, 2019 1:06 pm

    I just started practisung this mediation and find is very appealing and helpful to queit my mind, but keep experiencing two main issues, 1) i when i meditate listening to this recording, it seems my mind gets used to the „ routine of the words” and kind of bored because knows what happens next, so it is harder and harder and harder to experience the same amazing peace and harmony that i had for the first time listening to it.Is this normal ? It feel like staying on the object of meditation causes tension ( work) in my mind 2) during the video there is a lot of instructions/ information that kind interefere with my focusing in the meditation object utself, but when I try to meditate without the video I have a problem to „ stay on track” is this ok to continuation meditating listening to the sound /video ir should i try to meditate without it ( knowing the idea, ryłeś and recommendations ) ? I would like to comntionue this meditation because it helps me to battle my depression a lot !

  3. mick dooley

    April 2, 2019 10:05 pm

    Thank you for this. I am halfway through reading Path to Nibbana. I need to stop half heartedly meditating and fully commit. So grateful to have people like David on this planet.

  4. TheObjectiveRealist

    April 6, 2019 1:20 am

    So what is the point of switching from yourself to a spiritual friend? Wouldn’t just using yourself as the object be enough?

  5. Dan Deasy

    May 26, 2019 12:57 pm

    Thank you, that was totally amazing, my mind has been all over the place today (manly in the past or the future) and this meditation was truly calming and reinvigorating. Thanks once again for sharing!


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