Link’s Spiritual Deconstruction

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100 Responses

  1. tori Moore

    February 18, 2020 5:04 am

    This is where the I believe the 12 steps for a recovering addict like myself would be so helpful to anyone lol. "God as we understand him/her". The word god was scary to me as first, then I was taught all I needed was a higher power. First it was the love I saw In the rooms of NA/AA was once my higher power, the relationship with my daughter was my higher power, now it's a combination of all those things and I still dont know exactly who or what or why my higher power is and that's the beauty of it. I dont feel like I have to ever know. Loved these series. Love you guys. Takes a lot of courage.

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  2. melslatt

    February 18, 2020 5:54 am

    I really appreciate these guys sharing their stories. They were so vulnerable, respectful, and honest. About something that is so polarizing. It was really enjoyable to listen to and hear a new account of someone's human experience.

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  3. DesertCl0ud

    February 18, 2020 6:10 am

    I have to say that I have quite enjoyed these glimpses into your lives as I have gone through very similar situations as both of you to get to where I am today. I grew up in an evangelical church, very similar to you two… and I do remember being rather thoughtful and skeptical as Rhett has discussed, having spent time questioning my parents and pastor as a teen… I remember breaking down in tears in fear because various verses such as James 1:6 "…for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind." and Romans 14:23 "But whoever has doubts is condemned if they eat, because their eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin." I was genuinely scared… I also constantly had a feeling of guilt as Link mentioned. I always had a nagging issue that I didn't feel anything that I should have felt… like I constantly saw "people of God" and what they experienced and what I thought I should have been experiencing as a believer but wasn't… it wasn't until I was in my 20s that I opened myself up to all of the physical evidence that exists in the world… I'm happy to hear that others out there have had similar experiences as I have… Thank you both for sharing!

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  4. Eddie Nunnelley

    February 18, 2020 6:51 am

    Listened to both. This was big and impactful for me, as I have been through these uncanny experiences. It’s nice to hear something I’ve felt for so long coming from someone else.

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  5. Angela Mills

    February 18, 2020 7:25 am

    I have loved these videos so so much, and comforted to know that the questions and beliefs I have are shared.

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  6. Roy Fowler

    February 18, 2020 9:05 am

    Thank you. Thank you both. For having the courage to put your journey with God and how that relationship evolves over time. No one should be sad that someone seeks the truth of God, no matter what religion/science they use to get to their own individual truth. God is different for everyone, and everyone needs to go on their own journey to find God. The rules and regulations set forth by such systems for some people have to be discarded for them to find the ultimate truth. Honestly, Love everyone is the basis of all religions, and throwing out the old dogmatic rules associated with so many different religions, Love everyone is all any of them need. If you Love everyone, you don’t even need any other parts to make a system where everyone can coexist and be happy.

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  7. Zoe Gonzalez

    February 18, 2020 9:21 am

    Link and Rhett, thank you for these past few weeks of podcasts. I have been trying for the past few years to put into words how I was feeling about my religious and spiritual beliefs, I have spent the majority of the last year desperately trying to hold onto my beliefs that I was brought up with and what link said really spoke to me, that you’re on the ship and you’re scared to jump off but you suddenly realize you’re already floating down off of it. And that’s exactly where I was at, but it is so inspiring and honestly relieving that it is possible to be open without having to say yes I believe or no I believe in nothing. It is such a comfort to know that you both have at least “come off of the boat” and have still been able to move forward in your lives. I think in these few weeks you have both been able to shed some light onto the path less taken. And again I want to thank you both, thank you for sharing your experiences, because I can understand how deeply personal this is to talk about, and I am so grateful that you did share it because in doing so, it has put some of my fears to rest.

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  8. Aja

    February 18, 2020 11:16 am

    Well done you guys, takes a lot of balls talk about this kind of stuff and you did it with absolute class. Long time beast ♥️♥️♥️

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  9. Autumn Bough

    February 18, 2020 1:45 pm

    10:09 Rhett's interjection is something I heard in church growing up all the time and made me laugh just now.

    Signed, the kid who always asked "What was happening in America?" after they ended a story in Sunday school. 😉

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  10. Blacksheep paintball 049

    February 18, 2020 2:02 pm

    Atheists are open to god potentially existing. We are more open minded than most religious people. We simply require scientific evidence and proof of his existence. But as long as it is not proven we refuse to believe in even the potential the potential of a god because it is completely illogical and does not align with the scientific evidence of how the world and universe functions

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  11. orangebelle

    February 18, 2020 3:09 pm

    My story was very similar with Link the reason I stepped away for the church that I believed in was because they couldn't accepted my sister who was part of the lgbtq+ community. So I walked away.

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  12. BrooklynVlogs

    February 18, 2020 3:18 pm

    Oh God I had a feeling you guys were listening to Ken Ham, no wonder you guys stopped believing, The man is a nut.

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  13. Christoffer Eilsertsen

    February 18, 2020 3:20 pm

    I am so glad that Rhett and Link made these videos. It helped me feel better about the fact that I have doubts about my belief.

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  14. Hilde S

    February 18, 2020 3:34 pm

    Thank you for opening up and telling us your stories, when it comes to touchy subjects like these it must take courage to initiate a conversation and share. It was interesting to listen to you describe your journeys, as someone who doubted religion and became agnostic at a fairly young age, it was interesting to get the perspective of of someone who grew up in a highly religious community and see the emotional process behind such a change. I hope you both (especially Link, wow, you were too hard on yourself) will love yourselves despite whatever guilt might still get at you sometimes (I assume it does sometimes, hopefully I'm wrong, since your relationship with "god" was such a big part of both of your lives). Thanks for sharing.

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  15. Amber Holven

    February 18, 2020 3:58 pm

    Love is the key to everything Link. I had a very different up bring then the two of you , and in a different place. Yet, I find my self in a very similar place. I am maybe more hopeful then you are, but I think that just comes from the way we process things. Rhett may have brought up the questions, but you were struggling in your heart even without it. Thank you to both of you for being so open and honest with this.

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  16. William Irwin

    February 18, 2020 4:38 pm

    I'm a Roman Catholic and I appreciate you both telling your stories. I appreciate that you want to stay open to the truth and the possibility that God might exist. I pray that God bless you both.

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  17. dflosounds

    February 18, 2020 5:41 pm

    That you both SO MUCH for sharing your personal stories and beliefs like this. It seems to be becoming more and more difficult to talk about your beliefs (or non-beliefs) without offending someone or receiving harsh backlash, and watching you two discuss something so personal is very powerful to me. As someone who was raised Catholic but now considers himself a "skeptical agnostic", I can't even imagine discussing these things with my family, let alone an audience of millions of fans. I'm glad you did though, and thanks for showing me that I'm not alone in my struggles with religion.

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  18. ida folkesson

    February 18, 2020 6:01 pm

    they are so brave to sharing all of this. thank you guys! Link are not afraid to talk about this in a real emotional and deep way, and somehow that makes it so relatable.

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  19. Dannette Cox

    February 18, 2020 6:17 pm

    Link, the God-island you speak of has actually grown in size with the advancement of science in the last century. Modern science has been very unkind to atheists. For instance, scientists long held that the universe existed in an eternal steady state. Einstein's theory and Hubble's discovery has shown that our universe did, in fact, have a beginning. Now, if the natural world (universe) of time, space and matter had a beginning, then its cause had to therefore be, above nature (super-natural), timeless, spaceless and immaterial. RIght? Unless, of course, you believe that the universe created itself – which is illogical. For the universe to have created itself would mean that the universe would have had to exist before it existed.

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  20. Elizabeth Mary

    February 18, 2020 6:28 pm

    I've really appreciated these past two Ear Biscuits. I grew up super involved in church and faith, but became incredibly disillusioned after four years at a legalistic, horrible college. You guys have made me realize that it's okay to come to a point of kind of letting my faith go in a sense. I've just had it on a shelf ignoring it, but these podcasts have almost been therapeutic for me. It really hit me hard when Link said that he wasn't who everyone thought he was. That's exactly how I've felt probably sense high school. Thanks for sharing these personal stories, guys.

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  21. Matt Steadman

    February 18, 2020 6:47 pm

    I always find so much more theological and moral value in a person's exit story from a belief system, than the belief systems provide themselves.

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  22. missrosietee

    February 18, 2020 8:30 pm

    I relate so much more to Rhett's story but I absolutely love Link's heart. Maybe I'll start listening to earbiscuits more often if the content is this interesting!

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  23. itsmadimay

    February 18, 2020 10:10 pm

    the story of rhett telling link to get out of the car and then walking back to get him made me cry both times that i heard it. i can see it in my head and it breaks my heart dude. they've been through everything together.

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  24. Donna Jo Davis

    February 18, 2020 10:47 pm

    Interesting, but as a person of faith, I prefer to believe in a loving God. As for the LBQTB community, why does everyone assume that an evangelical would hate these people? Or that all churches would reject them? My church welcomes all who want to come. I have taken the time to teach my (now adult) children to love all. Their uncle left his marriage with my sister because he's gay. They still love him and treat him with respect. Their cousin is gay. Same thing. I agree some churches are homophobic, but NOT all believers are.

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  25. SJ Scrubs

    February 18, 2020 10:50 pm

    From what it sounds like, if I'm interpreting correctly, I think it boils down to "there's merit – GOOD merit – in an honest search for truth, and a desire to love others regardless of impetus". And I really respect that, Link.

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  26. Drew Liedtke

    February 19, 2020 1:43 am

    Link’s story resonates with my experience so hard. That feeling of safety in the structure. The feeling of just wanting to know that I’m doing okay even though I may not understand it all right now.
    I left the church because I started to feel like that safety and comfort was a lie. I started to see the holes and noticed how thin the veil over my eyes was, and I just couldn’t stay in that mindset knowing that it was a lie.
    For a long time I resented my parents and authority figures for perpetuating that lie. Then that resentment got tiring to keep up so I just let it go.
    I still feel it a little whenever I go back home, but I feel like I’m in a good place now.

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  27. Debbie Thomas

    February 19, 2020 3:08 am

    I couldn’t agree more. When I was 8 years old I was terrified of church. Talking about the rapture and the mark of the beast. Now an adult with a family of my own I have a very open mind about religion. To each there own. No one is wrong for their beliefs. Thanks for you both sharing your stories✌️

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  28. ECG

    February 19, 2020 9:08 am

    Church can feel so uniting and also so toxic. No one should tell you how to specifically have a relationship with god, or whomever you believe in. Its personal, individual. I like how this ended with the thought of wanting to be a hopeful agnostic. I do not have a strong belief in anything in particular myself, but it feels good to leave the door open and be open to what comes. I have to be thankful and grateful for my existence and the opportunities I have, and I personally feel I have to thank life itself for it. Whatever "life" is.

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  29. Travis Rodriguez

    February 19, 2020 3:24 pm

    @Link, You should consider taking a little more ownership to your present veiwpoint. You absolutely put a lot of this on Rhett in a way of saying "You did this!" As though to say further that somehow this way of thinking is wrong, which it certainly is not. When watching, it absolutely seemed as though you were brushing off your views as "Rhett, Rhett, Rhett!". To put it plainly, and I'm sorry if this upsets you, but you were spineless. Even if Rhett was a type of influence, YOU had a choice both then and now to what YOU think. YOU have control of your thoughts. YOU are an adult that can think whatever you want. Now act like it, lol.

    That said, you still have a great story and I am glad to have heard it. I know, Link, you don't like labels but I am a secular humanist. What that means essentially is I am a believer in people and the here and now. At any rate, I'm not even sure if you will actually read this but you and Rhett are cool dudes and not that you guys need a pat on the back but keep up the great work you guys have been doing over the years!

    YOU GUYS ROCK!!!

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  30. Brian Ganger

    February 19, 2020 6:01 pm

    Sounds like Link and Rhett both might consider Deism where there is a "god" but they have no direct interaction with people and their lives and miracles, divine writings etc… never happeneed. It is what a LOT of the signers of the Declaration of Independence were like Franklin, Jefferson, very likely Washington (though VERY hard to narrow down Washington as there are not any writings from him on his belief system)…

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  31. Nancy Rodrigues

    February 19, 2020 6:28 pm

    Religion is all about control through fear and therefore perpetuating ignorance. Also, how is religion a good thing when your initial response is to abandon your best friend on a dirt road when he tells you he made a mistake and got drunk at a party. How does that make you a good person/follower of God? It makes you an asshole for making your best friend feel like dirt. I’m glad Rhett came back for Link.

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  32. Joe Elson

    February 19, 2020 7:28 pm

    Thank y'all for these. I went through the same process a few years ago. It's great to see folks I find value in have had similar walks in life.

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  33. John Hendricks

    February 19, 2020 8:40 pm

    This is refreshing and a little scary. Your stories definitely resonate with what I went through and gives me hope. It’s been 2 years this month that I told my wife and while things have gotten better we have a long way to go. The scary part is that our kids (17 & 15) have no idea and I know my son follows you guys. The reason my kids have been kept in the dark is my wife’s wishes. I plan to share these videos with my wife cause I think she’ll relate to these stories. I would like to hear how your spouses are making it through this process. Thanks again and keep up the good work fellas.

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  34. TheMatron'sMilitia

    February 19, 2020 9:00 pm

    Do you think a church for agnostics would be a good thing? A way to have the system and community without the belief?

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  35. TheMatron'sMilitia

    February 19, 2020 9:40 pm

    I think a very relevant point to the whole conversation is that agnosticism and science aren't beliefs. They're a lack of belief. Science isn't a system of beliefs it's a methodology of asking questions and testing possible answers against reality. I always hear "well, you believe what you believe, I believe what I believe" but actually I don't believe, I question.

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  36. Cheyenne Dorsagno

    February 19, 2020 9:56 pm

    Thank you guys for being vulnerable and sharing these stories. I was always curious about this side of your lives and it's easy to understand why you would be hesitant to share. I am curious about where your wives are at now, although they may want to keep that personal. Really, anything else you have to say on the subject, even if it's just a "thought exercise", would interest me. Please keep telling your stories! Regardless of what people believe, anyone can relate to confronting the idea of God and figuring out how they feel about it. It really is a lifelong journey.

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  37. Helen Macklin

    February 19, 2020 10:45 pm

    As a agonist, dyslexic, insomniac I often find myself lying awake, wondering wether or not there is a dog.
    From one hopeful lifelong agonist, on the other side of the pond, these last view earbiscuits have been very interesting. And Rhett you totally influenced Link 😅 I'm just glad your both happier in your beliefs.

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  38. Margaret Benne

    February 20, 2020 12:21 am

    The falling away experienced by these men is fairly common for thoughtful fundamentalist evangelicals. The dark night of the soul has been experienced by many great saints. Great joy is to be found on the journey, and may only be realized at the ultimate destination. Welcome and peace be with you, fellow travellers.

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  39. Michael Coles

    February 20, 2020 1:21 am

    I can't help but be totally distracted by the state of the wallpaper in the back.
    It has started getting wrinkly from un-sticking from the wall.
    it looks horrible.

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  40. Aaron Goodman

    February 20, 2020 1:32 am

    It's amazing to hear both of you discuss such a serious topic. We are so used to the fun and games of GMM.

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  41. Who Wants to Know

    February 20, 2020 2:24 am

    Thank you both for sharing your stories, it's really cool getting to hear the deeper parts of your lives. Look forward to the occasional spiritual episodes to come.✌️

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  42. Nathan Prindler

    February 20, 2020 4:17 am

    Great article on this: https://www.patheos.com/blogs/youngfogey/2020/02/5-lessons-from-rhett-and-links-spiritual-deconstruction/

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  43. Rebecca Ledford

    February 20, 2020 4:43 am

    I relate to your journeys so closely. I delt with Rhett's struggle with fact and logic. And suffered from Link's pressure of perfectionism and being a disappointment. Thank you for helping me mentally articulate my experience.

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  44. Fen Labyrinth

    February 20, 2020 6:58 am

    Links expression of his journey here is very comforting and kind. I love the openness and nonjudgmental nondogmatic approach. The world needs more of this.

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  45. Fen Labyrinth

    February 20, 2020 7:04 am

    This video is so important and I appreciate it so much. It gives me so much comfort. Thank you for sharing.

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  46. MattChats

    February 20, 2020 7:16 am

    Do I have a theist belief system? Yes. Do I think my belief system is 100% the truth? Yes. But do I feel sad for you two after hearing your developments? Absolutely not. If anything, I respect y’all more for being open about these things.
    What really resonated with me in this was the idea that ‘People believe what the want to believe/what works for them.’ While that sounds like it could be a dismissal of all religions, it’s really a validation of them. Do I want to believe Catholicism? Yes, but I also want to believe the truth. So it stands to reason that I would assume Catholicism is the truth. But that notion could really apply to any religion, just replace ‘Catholicism’ with your belief system of choice. Ideas like that are what help me have religious tolerance, because I can acknowledge that everyone is doing and believing what’s best for themselves, without me feeling like I need to constantly evangelize or try to convert people. It’s a peaceful thought.
    Great series, guys. I’m definitely gonna be a more frequent Ear Biscuits listener from this point forward.

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  47. N̷ E̷R̷O̷vara

    February 20, 2020 1:59 pm

    It's so comforting to know you guys fully gave up your faith, like me. i'm surrounded by people who questioned their faith but still found a way to hold onto it. props them, props to us.

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  48. Flick

    February 20, 2020 2:40 pm

    Religion is such a burden on the mental health of our youth. Constantly being made to feel as though we're not good enough to live up to literal perfect expectations at the threat of eternal torture. The claim that god loves you, but will torment you if you turn away from his ugliness is the worst kind of abusive, toxic relationship. I'm glad your journeys took you away from that and I hope they continue to take you to a healing place. Thank you for sharing these stories.

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  49. Allison Small

    February 20, 2020 4:44 pm

    There’s nothing to argue about god, I wish people understood that more. It’s my choice to believe or not, and for people that have passed on I am hopeful that there is a god that they devoted their life to for so long. It’s hard to come to terms not being “religious” like I used to but this helps that others have the same questioning and hardships when it comes to faith. Thank you both for sharing your story, from a hopeful agnostic

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  50. Chelsea Dawn

    February 20, 2020 6:03 pm

    You guess should look into Unitarian Universalist churches. They are considered an open door church with no single denomination and may align more with your beliefs. Check it out! (Extremely and genuinely accepting to the LGBTQ community as well!)

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  51. Chelsea Dawn

    February 20, 2020 6:09 pm

    Also, thank you so much for your openness, honesty and love! Always be true to yourself and your beliefs and you will have love and acceptance!

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  52. Flick

    February 20, 2020 7:15 pm

    In response to your comments about atheism being final and somewhat dogmatic in itself, it doesn't have to be. Atheism isn't necessarily a declaration that god doesn't exist, but often a practical assumption that god doesn't exist. We don't claim to know for sure that god isn't real in the same way we don't claim to know for sure that our car problems weren't caused by gremlins. It's just that at a certain point, the idea of god becomes so absurd and unrealistic that we make the assumption no such being exists. You talk about being open, but writing off god as an explanation for anything opens you up to a far greater understanding of the world and yourself than being agnostic, which is just theistic fence-sitting. Atheism is nothing to be afraid of, which you may find out further along on your journey.

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  53. Tony Nickell

    February 20, 2020 7:55 pm

    Check out Street Epistomology on youtube….mainly Anthony Magnabosco…its a beautiful way to ask questions about any deeply held beliefs (not just religious btw) without confrontation. Its loosely based on the socratic method. More than likely you will never read this lol

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  54. Shadow Of The Stars Shadow Star

    February 20, 2020 10:21 pm

    Both of you have found and are finding your own spiritual paths.
    Keep doing you and move forward the way that feels right to you.
    Thank you both for sharing your stories.

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  55. Cylas Davidson

    February 21, 2020 4:33 am

    This is the first time I've watched one of your podcasts, I am enjoying it, but y'all have your microphones way to close to your faces. I can't tell if y'all are trying to do some asmr stuff, but Link has some odd breathing patterns.

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  56. SlightlyOddGuy

    February 21, 2020 2:56 pm

    Wow, I thought I identified with Rhett’s story, but wow, Link. It’s incredible to me how we have so many of the same experiences and thoughts. Really helps to feel that I’m not alone. Thank you for sharing.

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  57. bigdog1491

    February 21, 2020 2:58 pm

    Hey Rhett and Link, I’m truly curious, you mentioned Ken Ham and he gives science that goes against evolution. What made Ken Ham less credible than Francis Collins?

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  58. Christina Benoit

    February 21, 2020 6:45 pm

    This is really beautiful seeing you at this point in your journey. Thinking for yourself is a wonderful thing ❤️ I wish you all the best as you become more and more aware and comfortable with reality. Love you guys!

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  59. Christina Benoit

    February 21, 2020 6:46 pm

    I love that Link can finally love and accept himself for who he is. Religion steals that from people. Live your life and enjoy the gift of being here in this moment in time!

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  60. jerm t.

    February 21, 2020 7:15 pm

    Religion and religiousness led to questions that couldn't be explained or satisfactorily answered. The incongruence led to despondency and confusion. The despondency and confusion eventually led to spirituality and faith, and now no explanation is necessary.

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  61. Natalia Tracanelli

    February 21, 2020 10:03 pm

    This is amazing you should be allowed to feel how you feel and you're not wrong at all for falling out of your old beliefs very brave of both of you telling these stories , and very interesting I really liked it and I love you guys being more open ☺️

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  62. J. P.

    February 22, 2020 12:12 am

    I love you two's stories. They are shockingly similar to mine graduating from Mormonism. Glad you did your homework. Thanks for sharing Link.

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  63. WatchingYou

    February 22, 2020 4:31 am

    Link try to remember the love you felt in your heart the day you saw your first child the day they were born. That is the love your Father has for you now and all of your life.

    Reply

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